International Waters Are In. Our. City.

I’m not a lawyer. I can’t drive a boat. I’ve never been out very far in the sea. But I’ve heard that international waters are cray. “Anything can happen and it probably will” is a relevant saying from Hillsong’s classic ‘Church on Fire’.

International waters are dangerous I guess. Laws, what laws?

But did you know that the ocean has crept up onto our coast and done a little cheeky run into our suburbs? You don’t, do you? But you’re about to find out where international waters effectively exist in every city.

Train stations.

Yep. Dangerous like trying to light a fire with your eyes closed, a can of gasoline dripping from the roof and a newspaper factory 2.3 centimetres away.

That’s how I feel at train stations anyway.

I walk jovially from my house to a bus stop. I greet the bus driver with a cheery ‘hello!’ as I jump on the bus and I offer 3/7ths of a smile to the 510 school students all doing their best impression of a human-shaped pillar with earphones on. I jump off the bus whistling and skip down the road towards the train station.

And then everything changes.

Instead of joy I feel terror. Instead of whistling I growl like a possessive cat at a fish museum. Instead of skipping I start walking with an urgency usually only seen in emergency departments at the hospital.

I know they’re probably safe. But train stations sure feel like the one place anything could happen and it probably will. Laws? What laws?

The only thing missing is a pirate with a crew.

But then I see an 18 year old punk watching a clearly ripped-off version of La La Land on his iPad next to his three gangster friends and I shudder.

International waters have come to my city.

And piracy is rampant.

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